I'm dusting off my blog site today. On days like today I am drawn to write. Today would have been Christopher's 18th birthday. Likely, it would have been a very big day of celebration for my sweet boy. He sure did like to celebrate life to the fullest. Instead of planning a party, I plan and ponder on what would be the most significant way to mark this special day. He is absent from his body, but is present in spirit each and every day. The boy who taught me how much my heart could love, also taught me how much my heart can hurt. But I do not mourn like those that don't believe in the Truth of Life. I've been asked many times how I do it, how do I go on? The death of a child is every parent's worst nightmare, yet I survived it. I continue to breath, to live everyday as fully as I am able, and to actually have joy in my life. The truth is that I am one of the most sensitive people you'll ever know. I cry at Hallmark commercials, hungry children, abused dogs, etc. I never thought that I could survive such tragedy either. This is only more testament that my strenght comes from The Lord and not from me. My heart has been broken, but He holds it from falling apart. I do feel overcome from sadness at times, but God gets me through it each and every time. He never leaves me there. So on this very special day I want to share my hope with you all. Strength for our tragedies come only from The Lord. The Blood of the Lamb has washed us all clean so that our sins do not keep us from going to heaven and joining our loved ones who also believed. This is the greatest gift that mankind has ever known. Jesus defeated death and because of Him, we will all be together one day. So Happy Birthday my sweet Christopher John...until we meet again. Until then I hold the memories you left me close to my heart. Love, your momma.
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| Birthday Boy |
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| Crazy about books |
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| Having fun at Suessland in Orlando |
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He loved music
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| With his dad and brothers making smores in our backyard |
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