To clarify that I would not trade any of my experiences: there is the one thing that I would trade in a heart beat- the death of my Chris. There is nothing that I would want more in life than to have him still with me. I don't want to minimize the pain that the death of a child brings.
"And can it be that in a world so full and busy the loss of one creature makes a void so wide and deep that nothing but the width and depth of eternity can fill it up" - Charles DickensThere are some things that no matter how Christian you are, you can never understand. These questions are ones that only God can answer. I have allowed them to be left unanswered. One day, I can ask Him directly. Until then, I can only trust that He knows why. That will have to do for now.
"I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies: and whoever lives and believes in me will never die.".
John 11: 25-26
My Chris did not cease to exist; he is just no longer physically with us. But to be absent in the body is to be present with the Lord.
To those that love you and know you, that explanation is never needed.We know how much you love Christopher and how desperately you miss him. That quote, I have never used again. Even as we have lost moare of our fellow warriors along the way on this journey. It will always and forever be etched in my heart just for Chris. Always.
ReplyDeleteHeather, thank you. Thank you for giving me that quote and for the many other etchings you've made in my heart. You are one of the gifts that I got through the trials of Cancer. Unfortunate as it was to have met on the Oncology Unit of Children's Hospital, I'm so glad we were brought together.
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